Complicating meditation practice with all manner of striving is natural - striving toward certain ‘spiritual’ experiences like: a quiet mind, feelings of bliss, and special insights. Unfortunately striving only leads to more striving - striving never arrives at real peace.
How can we lose this habit of striving during our practice?
The Quran declares that the only purpose of this life is to worship God. This declaration can certainly point the way.
I have not created the jinn and the humans except to worship Me. [Quran 51:56]
The key word here is worship. In Arabic the word translated as worship is ibada (ee-bah-da).
‘Ibadah’ is derived from the root word ‘abd, which means a servant, to be a slave/obedient, to exhibit humble submission.
In pure surrender (worship) there is no striving - just patiently sitting in Silence without any expectation whatsoever.
So … try sitting without expectation. You will be amazed at how quickly you find what you were always looking for.
peace on you,