Meditation unlike almost every human activity does not necessitate more doing. It is at the root an undoing; it is unlearning - a letting go of "how you think it ought to be".
Where has all your striving to be 'spiritual' or to achieve some 'enlightenment' lead you? All those books and all those 'teachers'! Why not try something different?
Take refuge in Silence; let go. If you become silent enough there is nothing that you will not know.
Empty yourself utterly … or stated another way:
Say, 'I seek refuge with the Lord of the dawn, From the evil of what He has created, And from the evil of the utterly dark night when it comes, And from the evil of those who blow on knots, And from the evil of the envious when he envies. (Quran 113)